No one looks back wishing they were more stressed, yet we continue to stress ourselves out. While some stressors are inevitable, we bring a lot of stressors to the forefront of our lives.
Beating ourselves up in the pursuit of perfection.
Setting unrealistic expectations about what we should do and who we should be.
Focusing on our flaws rather than our strengths.
We justify these habits under the belief they will make us better and more successful.
But if we’re always dissatisfied on the path to success, and if happiness is always sitting around the bend, are we really traveling in the right direction?
The truth is, we don’t need to live up to these abstract expectations to be loved, complete, or fulfilled. We can enjoy life without fulfilling any expectations or goals.
Instead of choosing unrealistic expectations, I choose calm. I keep different perspectives in mind, let things go, and make some judgement calls to determine what really matters. This includes letting go of perfection, expectations, and beliefs that don’t serve us.
But what about the pursuit of perfection? How do we maximize our time and productivity? Squeezing value out of every second is exhausting. Calm offers a much better path.
How did I get to this perpetual calm state of mind? I haven’t because it’s not a destination and I don’t stay calm forever. One moment I’m calm, the next moment I’m not.
Then I choose to do one of the following:
Breathe.
Go to sleep.
Take a break.
Go on a walk.
Listen to a podcast.
Laugh at the situation.
Consider different perspectives.
And I start again.
But above all, I choose calm.
Not because it’s the easiest or most obvious path, but because it’s the best path for me right now.
When we notice the barriers we set for ourselves, we realize we can also set ourselves free.