Some look to consumerism for a path to betterment. If consumerism invites us to acquire more, then happiness is dependent on more things. This assumes if I get a new car, career, or vacation home, I’ll be happy.
Others think self-help is the answer. Yet self-help also invites us to add more projects, goals, habits, and tasks into our lives. All these additions help us “fix” ourselves and become happier, healthier, and more successful.
There is nothing wrong with purchasing new things or wanting to improve; humans are known to evolve over time. When our ability to love ourselves is dependent on consumerism or goals, we’ve missed the point.
Even the most ambitious person in the world won’t achieve self-love if it’s dependent on achieving a goal, because a new goal will always fill the gap.
Relentless achievement is like the person who got second place, wishing they got first. It’s a comparison game, and we never acknowledge our progress.
Looking for self-love through achievement is like finding a flaw in a new car. Everything may be perfect momentarily, but eventually a dent will appear, and our discontent will arise.
Self-love is like the person who got third place, proud of the fact that they even made it to the podium at all.
We can love ourselves, dents and all, while still striving to grow. If we love ourselves first, we can be proud of the milestones we’ve made, and manage our emotions with greater ease.
We see the beauty in our behavior, rather than “fixing” a broken person. You are worthy of self-love, but we all need to see that for ourselves.
–
If you found value in this post, please consider buying me a coffee.