You should workout every day.
You should invest for retirement.
You should go to bed earlier.
Ask ten different people what you should do, and you’ll get ten different answers. Look around; we’re shoulding all over ourselves.
Shouldering a pile of shoulds gets heavy. After following so many shoulds over the years, only one thing became certain: I was stretched too thin.
As Economist Thomas Sowell reminds us, “There are no solutions, there are only trade-offs.” When we do one thing, we are not doing something else as a result. This isn’t a result of poor planning or productivity; this is our reality.
When we tell ourselves we should do something, we’re judging ourselves.
When we tell others they should do something, we’re dictating an expectation.
What if we replace “should” with “could”? Could represents a choice we can choose, if we decide that’s what’s best for us. The language we use speaks volumes, especially since we’re always hearing our own self-talk.
Should identifies a command.
Could illustrates an opportunity.
I’m not saying you should change your vocabulary, but you could if that’s what works best for you.
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